I Failed!?

Poor little innocent me.  

I just tried to open a new bank account.  The bank representative, my husband and I were having a nice chat, and then it was time for the background check.  

No problem, says I. I don't even have any traffic tickets in my permanent record.

And then I failed.  

Homeland Security failed me.  

Huh?

Really, I'm no threat to anyone.  (Well, maybe to a couple of people, but I'm mostly harmless.)

It turns out that because I have had my credit stolen twice in the past two years, and as a result of that, because I've put a security flag on my credit reports, Homeland Security has put a security flag on ME.  Poor little older-ish ME.

TSA trusts me; I always get TSA pre-check when I fly and I don't have to take off my shoes or empty my bags or undress at security checkpoints. TSA doesn't care about my stolen credit id.

Even the local police don't care about my stolen credit id.

But Homeland Security does care!

I feel so loved.  

(And so inconvenienced. I have to go back tomorrow with my social security card, my birth certificate, and a bill in my name. And then they'll take my money.)

The Weekend

First of all, older daughter ran in the New York City Marathon. This is her after she finished, and she is holding her medal. YAY hokgardner!!!: This is my nephew and his wife after their beach wedding in Florida. dH and I flew down to attend and it was lovely. Don't they look happy!!!

And I must share this, the cake topper. The bride's favorite toy when she was a child was Legos, so her mother surprised her with this Lego bride and groom. And the cake was layer after layer of cupcakes, four different flavors, with a large cupcake on top.

And now for my learning experience, courtesy of the TSA.

Going through security - for the last THREE of four flights - I have been groped uh, inspected by a TSA agent. Every %^&*() time I go through the whatever-it-is we all have to walk through, the alarms go off.

The first time this happened, about a month or so ago, the TSA agent eventually decided, after getting to know me a little tooooo well, that the cause of the machine's alarm was a garment I was wearing that had....underwire in it.

YUP. Underwire. Very, very dangerous.

I thought that this was just a fluke. A very sensitive machine perhaps.

Then it happened again. Same conclusion.

Then it happend AGAIN. I even told the agent what the cause was. No matter. I must go through the groping enhanced security.

Yesterday, it happened AGAIN. The first agent had me take off my bracelet. I did. And on my second waltz through the machine, I turned just a wee bit sideways, and made it through. No bells. No buzzers. Whew.

Now you might think that I should be a faster learner, and maybe I should be. But silly me. I just think that my underwear, which is worn UNDER my clothing, is my business. No one else's.

But apparently I am wrong. Apparently it is TSA's business.

So to avoid this happening every.freaking.time I fly, I must buy undergarments that will pass the oh-so-stringent TSA standards.

I know I feel so much safer now. How about you???