Monday, December 16, 2013

Worse Things Have Happened to Better People.



Official Me:  I KNOW it!  Leave me alone!

other me:  Then stop complaining!  I'm tired of hearing about how much you hate the boot.

Official Me:  It's been ten %T^&*() weeks that I've hobbled around in this thing. It's heavy.  It's uncomfortable.  And I think it might smell a little.  I can't tell.  I'm tall.

other me:  Blah, blah, blah.

Official Me:  You don't know.  You haven't been wearing it.

other me:  Really?  Where have I been then?

Official Me:  You know what I mean.  It's getting really, really old, wearing this thing, and the orthopedist better tell me tomorrow that I don't need it any longer or...

other me:  or what?

Official Me:  Breaking News!!!  Orthopedist beaten about the head and neck with a walking cast left at the scene.

other me:  Yeah.  Sure.

Official Me:  Suspect ran off.  Authorities expect her to be caught soon.  She was last seen limping, wearing one Dansko and one sock, possibly hand knit.

other me:  Oh, great.  Stuck in a jail cell with you.  Lunatic.

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