Official Me: I KNOW it! Leave me alone!
other me: Then stop complaining! I'm tired of hearing about how much you hate the boot.
Official Me: It's been ten %T^&*() weeks that I've hobbled around in this thing. It's heavy. It's uncomfortable. And I think it might smell a little. I can't tell. I'm tall.
other me: Blah, blah, blah.
Official Me: You don't know. You haven't been wearing it.
other me: Really? Where have I been then?
Official Me: You know what I mean. It's getting really, really old, wearing this thing, and the orthopedist better tell me tomorrow that I don't need it any longer or...
other me: or what?
Official Me: Breaking News!!! Orthopedist beaten about the head and neck with a walking cast left at the scene.
other me: Yeah. Sure.
Official Me: Suspect ran off. Authorities expect her to be caught soon. She was last seen limping, wearing one Dansko and one sock, possibly hand knit.
other me: Oh, great. Stuck in a jail cell with you. Lunatic.
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