Curse You, NPR!!!

I bet you think that the part of this project in the right top portion of the photo is a sleeve

You would be wrong. This project is a vest. Vests don't have sleeves.








Sorry for the delay. I was eating a popsicle.

Now, for the vest. I learned a very cool and neat way to cast off (sewn cast off---brilliant!) and once I finished doing that, I turned on a podcast to listen to while I sewed the side seams of the vest. I clicked on (by accident. I thought I was turning on Wiretap) Radio Lab and the participants were talking about the very interesting Argentine ants.

Yes, interesting. They migrated via ships from Argentina to New Orleans during the 1800's and now can be found all over the world. How do the evolutionary biologists know this?

Well, I'm glad you asked: they put some Argentine ants into a jar, add some mystery ants, and once they sniff each other, they either get on with whatever they had been doing (trying to escape from the jar, I suppose), or they fight to the death. The Argentine ants always win which is why they now live even in Australia. That is pretty amazing since they can't swim. The ants love our freeways and our ships, apparently, and use them to take over the ant world!

While I was learning all about Argentine ants, I was sewing the sides of the vest together. The problem is that I sewed the two side edges of the back together, making a tube and not a vest. And I did such a good job of sewing the seam, tying up the ends, and weaving them in to the fabric of the vest, that I CANNOT get the seam un-sewn.
I'm nothing if not stubborn, however, and I hope to get this problem solved before I have to take the so-called vest to knit night on Thursday and beg politely ask someone to help.

And no more listening to NPR podcasts while I knit.

Why I Don't Often Swatch

Reason 1: I don't want to. That simple.

Reason 2: I believe it was the Yarn Harlot who said:  Swatches lie.

And before I give you Reason 3, this is what I am up to:

I have just started working on this v-neck vest for my grandson. It is the Fundamental Junior Vest #F07 published by Figheadh Yarnworks and designed by Jen Hagan. The pattern includes instructions for each of four weights of yarns, and I decided I wanted to make the one for 5 stitches/inch since I am working with yarn that is slightly less thick than worsted weight.

The yarn I found in my stash (Euro Baby Sweetness) works up to 5.5 sts/inch on size 5 or 6 needles. So for once, I decided to make a swatch to see which size needles to work with and which size vest to knit.

I knit the swatch with size 5 needles, figuring that they would be right on the 5 sts/inch that I needed. But it came out to 5 and one thread of the next stitch/inch. Close enough, I decided.

Uh, NO. That one thread of the next stitch is the ONE HALF stitch that I don't need. But since I ignored the swatch, I started knitting on size 5 needles and had a HUGE sweater back.

So, Reason 3: Even if the swatch does lie, I don't listen anyway, so it doesn't really matter.

I ripped out the knitting I had done and started over using size 4 needles. Now I am on gauge (I assume, haven't measured but the fabric looks nice) and I'm on my way.

I read some of the comments on Ravelry about this pattern from other knitters, and several people mentioned knitting this in the round. I thought: How on earth would I convert this pattern to an in-the-round pattern? and kept knitting. A few inches in, a lightbulb went off in my puny brain and I realized just how easy it would be to do.

And then I decided to just keep going. Next time, if there is a next time, I'll knit it in the round.

(But I'm having second thoughts...)

This is the skirt I made for Lily and I am happy with how it came out, even though I wasn't sure that the Knit Picks Cot Lin was a good choice for the pattern. It worked out well enough, and it's twirly and swirly, just like Lily.

I am skirted out. No more skirts.

Generous! That's What I Am!

And yet my daughter just can't bring herself to accept my generosity.

See all these strands of yarn left on Lily's skirt? Well, they all need to be tied off and woven into the skirt's fabric. I generously offered to send the skirt as is to my daughter so that she could enjoy doing this, but she said "No, thanks."

I can't think of a more perfect task for her. It's easy and she could do it while watching her four children. And yet she says No.

On an unrelated subject, yesterday I had a procedure the name of which starts with a "c" and ends with "oscopy." It was everything everyone had said it would be and even more. And my friend who might be named Kathy and who has been nagging encouraging me for about a year to have one done, is relieved that I did. And while I can't say I am happy about finally having it, I will admit that it is a good thing that I did.

Oh, and my prescription for the stuff I had to drink the night before says this:
Gosh, and I had a few hours I was looking forward to filling on Saturday.

Lily's skirt

I have finished Lily's skirt and it is currently blocking. I haven't put in the elastic yet either.

It is the Hip in Hemp pattern, made from five colors of CotLin yarn from Knit Picks. I am apparently bad at math: the pattern called for THREE contrasting colors and one main color. I bought FOUR contrasting colors. I don't know why.

And I bought THREE balls of each color. I have two left over of each of the contrasting colors, and one left over of the main color.

Again....poor math skills, although using too many colors does explain some of the leftover yarn, but not all of it.

Other Ravelry knitters used CotLin for their Hip in Hemp skirts and that's why I chose it, but I'm not altogether happy with it. It's a heavy cotton/linen blend. Perhaps when it is dry, it will drape nicely and the weight will help with that----I hope.

Irony Perhaps?

Not really sure if this qualifies.

But anyhow, my Texas daughter finds the all-too-occasional tarantula in her house. For whatever reason, she doesn't kill them; she relocates them to the great outdoors. (Scorpions she kills. Yay.)I would have hoped to never see a tarantula...but,

my neighbor is out of town for three days and she asked if I would feed her various pets: 1 cat, two birds, two turtles, one supposed hermit crab-I have never seen it, and one TARANTULA.

Get OUT!  A pet tarantula???

I don't have to feed it (what on earth does it eat?); I just have to spray it with special water so that its exo-skeleton won't dry out. If it does dry out, the tarantula won't be able to move. To me, and probably to Martha Stewart, this is a GOOD thing. My neighbor says no: the dry exo-skeleton might cause the tarantula to shed said exo-skeleton ahead of schedule.

They SHED their exo-skeletons? Blechhh....Gaaaaaag....

She says not to worry, that chances are, the tarantula would eat it.

Oh, even better.

Who Knew?

There is knitting music!

Found on Ravelry.

Yes, I had too much free time today.

Something There Is

that doesn't love the outside, and it's currently living in my house.

All day yesterday I heard odd knocking and thumping sounds from my kitchen. I would listen, shake my head and decide that it was just the house/cabinets/whatever? settling. After all these years?

But this morning, Bad Boy Baxter was clawing at an area under the dishwasher that goes to the basement. I don't know why that opening is there, but it is. Baxter clawed, meowed, scratched and meowed some more. Now I KNOW something is there. It's not the house settling. It's probably a chipmunk.

There is a room in my basement we call dH's "workroom." However, it is sometimes a workroom, but it is mostly a hoarder's dreamworld/landfill/toxic site. And there is a door to the outside which is occasionally open when dH goes in and out while doing yard work. I believe that is when something got IN.

dH is going out of town for the week, so I'm going to ask him to set the havahart trap in his workroom/hoarder's world/landfill/future EPA site and hope that whatever is in the house gets in the trap instead of running around the kitchen. Granted, Baxter would be happy to chase it around, but I would not.

If it turns out to be a chipmunk, I'll say hi to it and set it free. If it's a rat, I'll scream like a girl and run.......

Tinking. Tinking. Tinking.

That's what I am doing.

I think I will stop knitting skirts after I finish (if I finish) this one. Skirts have the weird ability to sabotage me. I would swear that I had picked up the correct color for this round, but when I had finished FOUR rows in the light blue, I saw my mistake.

So now I am taking four rows out, stitch by stitch, because I am too certain that I would lose stitches if I just ripped the rows out.

Knitting is fun. Knitting is fun. Knitting is...oh, rats. It is FIVE rows......

It Worked!!!

The orange yarn in this picture is from the provisional cast-on. I've done crocheted provisional cast-ons before, but this is the first time that it just pulled right out when I needed to take it out.

This is the waistband for the Hip in Hemp skirt I am making for Lily. It won't take over a year as mine did!

I promise, Lily.

Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers

Or: truth is stranger than fiction.

Senior Citizens Flash Mob!

For more on their group: go here.

Dear Black and Blue Salvia,

Yes, you.

When I bought you and brought you home and planted you, I had such high hopes: beautiful flowers, butterflies, bees and hummingbirds swarming around you, and the contrast of your color with the other colors in my garden---it all sounded so wonderful.

I planted you. I fed you. I watered you. I pruned you when you needed it.

But did you cooperate? No, you did not. You rarely flowered. You spread all. over. the. place, putting other flowers in complete shade. So I worked and worked and worked to put you in the perfect spot for you.

But did that work? Were you happy with the space I provided?

No, you were not, and this year you have taken over way too much space.

So you are gone. I have pulled every bit of you OUT. The other flowers rejoice.

And if you dare show even one bit of green above the ground, I will carpet bomb you.

With Roundup.

You have been warned.

Innocence Lost

Poor Baxter.Until last Thursday night, Baxter has had a dream life. Everyone is nice to him; he doesn't have to share his kingdom with any other four-legged animals, and lately we have even allowed him to go out on the deck, with the steps blocked off and with us out there with him or just inside on the sofa by the windows. He loves to go out and sniff whatever it is he sniffs. Along with the garage, it's his only wilderness.

The world was a wonderful and kind and safe place.

But last Thursday night, when I was at knitting, dH forgot that he left the door to the deck open. He went upstairs, turned on the Tour de France, and forgot the rest of the world, including Baxter's wilderness world. After dark, he heard the sudden crash of the gate and the yowling of two cats. He ran downstairs and saw the orange cat that wanders the neighborhood and Baxter running after him around the to the front of the house. The orange cat ran across the street and Baxter hid. dH went inside to get a flashlight and searched for Baxter. Eventually he saw the reflection of the flashlight in Baxter's eyes but Baxter would not come out of the shrubbery.

I came home to find dH sitting at the edge of the driveway with a flashlight and a container of Baxter's treats. Baxter wouldn't come out. I took dH's place and talked to Baxter while dH went inside to get some tuna fish. Baxter cautiously emerged from the shrubs (he loves ME the most; it ain't bragging if it's true), and I grabbed him.

For two days Baxter hid in his cube, not even coming out for food. He is skittish and even now (Tuesday) mostly hides. He is a little more active when he appears and he is eating, but he is not back to his normal bad boy self.

Maybe Prozac for cats?

And the orange cat? HE needs to have a chat with his owners, who in cold weather, put a PINK quilted vest on him. I don't know for sure that he IS a he, but based on his behavior and Baxter's reaction, I'm pretty sure HE is.

Yarn Bombing Gone Bad?

Mrs. G Has Left the Building

but her shoes remain!

Perhaps this means that Mrs. G (of the Women's Colony) will be back!

Or she was running so fast to escape from Baxter that the shoes couldn't keep up.

Either way, it sure was lots of fun to meet her----Safe travels Mrs. G!

Wow!

This boulder is a relatively new installation at the Los Angeles County Museum of Art.

It must be a little weird to walk under it, but it's very cool.

My LA daughter can probably guess where we're going next time I visit.

And BG

(Before Google)From The New Yorker magazine

Did it used to be OK to not know something? I'll have to Google that.....

Are We In H*LL?

Finished.....

I just finished the Hip in Hemp Skirt that has been on the needles since 2011. I'm happy with the results; I won't hold a grudge---it's not the skirt's fault that it took me so long.

I did take Mere's advice (thank you!) and knit a few extra inches before I cast off, and thanks to Ravelry readers' notes, I realized I had not copied the cast off instructions, which required 10 rows of garter stitch. That added an inch to the length and thank goodness, I had enough yarn.

This skirt kept getting fuller as it got longer, and I was worried that I would need one of these to wear it properly.

If only I had read the other knitters' comments on this skirt BEFORE I started the skirt I would have known how to make it longer without making it wider, and at the same time, maintain the desired shape of the skirt. And I could have skipped all the math and logic and painful thinking that doing the calculations myself entailed:

If I were a more experienced knitter, I would have been able to figure out with my own little brain how to make the changes I needed to make with. It was embarrassingly easy! Just add one extra stockinette row between the increase rows---4 rows instead of 5. Duh.

This skirt took forever and a month to knit, has one bazillion stitches and I LOVE it!

The Never-Ending Linen Skirt

I started this skirt after Stitches South, 2011. Here we are, in June of 2012, and I'm still knitting it. Claudia of Claudia Hand Painted Yarn told me that I should make it long enough to cover the tops of my boots. "No leg showing," was how she put it. Well, I am tired of knitting this and it just now only covers my knees.I went online last night to determine what Fashion says about the proper length of skirts with cowboy boots (older daughter, who lives in Texas, says that there, they just call them "boots") and this is representative of what I found:
I didn't find any pictures of anyone wearing longer skirts. Unfortunately, I think that Fashion doesn't deal with um....elderly...no, that's not right.....Mature (that's it!) mature women wearing boots.

I have most of one skein of linen remaining, so I can knit on and on and on and........

...but I don't think I will. I'll try it on once more and then decide where to stop. I had thought of doing a picot bind off until I remembered that I have a million and ten stitches on the needle. No picot for me.

Publix Thanks Pioneer Woman

Or at least they should.

Yesterday, in a fit of rainy day boredom, I downloaded PW's list of things she keeps on hand in order to be able to make a meal without going to the grocery store. I hate going to the grocery store, and as a result, I go there more often than I'd like. I'm not organized, can't figure out in advance what to cook and go to the store almost daily when inspiration hits...if it hits. If it doesn't hit, I still end up at the store wandering the aisles, looking for inspiration. Or I go to Fresh Market and buy something that just needs the minimum of preparation.

Today I went through the list and bought the things that apply to my cooking. My pantry is nearly full. Maybe this system will work.

In preparation for this shopping extravaganza, I dug all my reusable grocery bags out of the trunk. I have lots of bags, not because I'm such a good environmentalist, but because I generally forget to take them into the store and then buy more. So I have a lot, and from a lot of different stores, including my local UPS store. And a couple from Mexico. I've decided that if I keep them on the passenger seat of my car I am less likely to forget them.

We'll see......

Rainy Day Ramblings

It's raining, thank goodness! We have had so many years of drought that it is nice to have rainy days...whole days of rain.

So I have nothing much to report. It's a day to stay in pajamas all day, although I did shower and get dressed, but I didn't make the bed---yet---so there's that bit of laziness.

I saw in yesterday's AJC a comment from someone: Crabby people should, instead of complaining about whatever, say nice things to three people each day. I don't write about philosophies, politics, religion or anything else deep; there are already people who do that better than I ever could, but I do think that if crabby people (and non-crabby people, as well) did what the writer advised, a whole lot of people would be happier.

I sometimes think that I should get my cat a cat, someone besides my husband and me that he could play with. He's three years old now and still VERY playful. He needs a new victim playmate. But a friend who is a real cat-lover and who has rescued and fostered many cats, says that Baxter is the king of the house, and that he wouldn't appreciate a new cat. Baxter is an indoor cat and I think that living indoors for a cat is like a reader being told that he could only read the first page of the same book, over and over and over. Nothing more than that one page. That has nothing to do with getting Baxter a friend; it's just that I think his life is already sort of limited and poor thing, he doesn't even have a friend to share his limited life with. Just us humans.

My husband redeemed his Groupon yesterday and took a flight over the city of Atlanta in this biplane:
I bought him the coupon for Christmas, he finally redeemed it and said it was fun. Maybe that's what I should get him for every gift-giving occasion. I've given him a few duds: the race car drive he didn't take and the remote-controlled helicopter that the clerk TOLD me not to give him. He has never successfully flown it. It is apparently very complicated, which I why the clerk advised me---repeatedly---to get him one that to me looked like a child's toy. But did I listen??? No. And every flight attempt has resulted in broken blades.

Yay for the interwebs! At Stitches South, Lucille and I bought mesh, zippered pouches which are great for various knitting supplies and you can see what is in them. Yesterday I thought that one would make a great holder for my cell phone for when (or if) I ride my bike. I have a basket, but I learned the first time I tried to ride to a destination (the library to return books) that when I fall off the bike, the stuff in the basket falls as well. Not so bad for the books, but bad for an iPhone. I looked for the label in the mesh pouch and then searched the internet. There they were! I ordered the correct size and it's already been shipped. Once I add a carabiner I'll be ready to go.

I wish I could see my grandchildren more often; they are just so much fun to spend time with. Even Elizabeth, who has in the past been referred to as the honey-badger (it's not a compliment; don't watch the video if you don't like gross, brutal nature), is no longer a honey badger; she's a DOLL. She talks all of the time and is really interesting and funny. It has been a treat to watch all four grow up and change. Soon they'll be teenagers, bored to tears when they have to spend time with their old grandparents. Do we h.a.a.a.a.v.e to???

As promised: ramblings.


The End.

Oh, I forgot to say: It is possible to spend WAY too much time on the interwebs, but in my defense, it is still raining.

The End.

Don't Try This At Home...or anyplace else

And Their Point Is?

And can I get one of these researchers to clean my house?

How Old Are You?

That's what my husband asked when he noticed my newly-polished nails yesterday.

I ignored his question.
They coordinate with my knitting!
And with one of my rugs!
And my purse!
And my walls!
And my lunch plate!
And my iPod!
I like turquoise.

A Sock!

I finished a sock!

Now I need another one!

Elizabeth's Ruffled Dress

Finally!

This dress has been a test of wills since before I started it, when the store that had the yarn I needed had just the amount the pattern called for. Not one extra skein.

And it turns out that whether you make a size four (like this dress) or a size ten (as Sallyknit did), there is barely enough yarn to make the dress. Actually there isn't enough yarn which is why Sallyknit and I both added stripes in the secondary color in order to make the main color go far enough. She had six inches of the main color left; I had a bit more remaining because I made the dress shorter in order to fit Elizabeth, who isn't quite into size four clothing yet.

Phew....

And Lucille, knitter and crocheter extraordinaire, made the beautiful flower and leaves for the dress and taught me how to do the crochet edging for it. Thank you Lucille!

So now off in the mail it goes, with a warning to my daughter. Be careful where Elizabeth wears it. It has to be washed by hand and laid flat to dry and it takes forever and a year to dry. Kind of a nuisance for a mom of four, I know, but I didn't know this before I made it. Sorry H!

The flower:

Gee. Baking is Fun.

Really?---no.

A couple of pounds of flour on the floor. Someone didn't put the top on the flour canister tightly.

So that was fun. I hope I enjoy the rhubarb pie when it's finished.

Until then, you'll find me vacuuming and washing the floor and tracking Baxter through the house...

Signpost

Get it?

Sign post?

A post about signs?

Never mind.

What can I say? I love weird, corny, odd, funny signs. I'm just back from Austin, TX where I saw these:

A little rude maybe---
Snicker....

Um... A hair studio? I get the Cut but the Shoot? My daughter suggested that they take pictures of the haircuts, but this IS Texas, so something else may be going on. Think .....shooting range out back???And what does a stag have to do with Catholic supplies? Or tile?
Chuckle....
I did NOT take a picture of the three vultures devouring a newly car-hit deer alongside the road.

You're welcome.

**********************************

Enough of that.

Lily's dance recital was on Saturday and I was there----it was a lovely event, Lily danced perfectly and then received these beautiful flowers from her many fans.

My last night in Austin I was accompanied by one of these creatures on my walk down the hall to the bedroom, only the one I met was much LARGER and much SCARIER than this one. Really!!!

I shouted for my sister (who wasn't even there---weird) and then when she didn't immediately show up, for my daughter. My son-in-law and oldest granddaughter showed up first. My granddaughter shouted: Don't kill it!!!

WHAT??? Kill it ten times over, I say. Then put it down the garbage disposal. Ten times.

But instead, my daughter trapped it under a glass, and my granddaughter and son-in-law slid a piece of paper under the glass and scorpion and took it outside to set it free, where it probably did a U-turn and headed back for the house where its thousands of babies still live.

I'm back in Atlanta, where there are no scorpions. I think.

Phew....

Finished. I had planned to use all of the yarn on the skeins, but got tired of the thing before that happened. So I have yarn left over and I will take it to Austin with me to see what I can get the older girls to weave on their loom.

I did a picot bind off to make the process more creative and less boring, but the less boring part didn't happen. And yes, I could have put pins in each of the little points of the picot, but I didn't want to love the frilly edges.

Now on to the rest of the Hip in Hemp skirt I started over a year ago. I put it on a 60" cord and put the elastic in the waist and discovered that it fits!!! I see a light at the end of the tunnel on this project and I don't think it's the train coming at me. I think it's a nearly finished skirt...and it's about time. And I think it's going to be beautiful. Fingers crossed.

A Bigger Project

I am actually knitting something that is NOT:

a scarf
a shawl
a shawlette
a hat
socks


It is this sweater, for me!!!


Scarf not included.  I have enough scarves...

My LYS didn't have the yarn for this, so they ordered it from Maggi Knits and lo and behold, MK had only nine turquoise skeins of it remaining, and I NEEDED nine turquoise skeins and they are now mine! It was meant to be.

Unfortunately, the book containing the pattern has a bunch of other patterns, none of which I like; they are weird. For example:

It's called the Lough Tay. I have no idea what that means, unless it means tacky, really, really tacky. And ugly. Really, really ugly.

It probably doesn't though.

If anyone would like to buy this book for half price or quarter price or a dollar after I have finished the sweater, I would be very happy to unload it on some sucker share it with someone.

Just e-mail me.

This book will want a new home.